When did life get so...
Complicated?
When I was in school if I liked someone I just told them. Now that I'm older and about 30lbs heavier, I'm afraid to even approach half the guys I like. Nevermind the ones that I can actually talk to, I mean heaven forbid I actually own up to some feelings for a change. I really miss Scott at times like this. I miss having someone to come home to and cuddle up with on the couch in front of the fire. I miss having someone to cook for and to cook for me. I really miss the just being comfortable enough to say whatever and not worry about him thinking I'm a complete idiot.
When you've been on a grand total of NO dates and guys just want to hang out in groups you start to get a bit more self concious. It's funny because Sara tells me ' you can't be self concious because guys can sense it' well isn't that great because they're the ones making me feel that way! What happened to that unashamed girl that would walk right up to a guy and say hey you wanna go out? I mean where the heck did I loose her??? I keep trying to dig her back out and breathe life back into that person but I'll be damned if I can even find her under all this sad, lonely, self concious carcass I have. I've really got to fix these self esteem issues I've got or else I'll never meet anyone! And then I really will be the dog lady... how sad and pathetic does that sound? Yeah, pretty pathetic. *sigh*
On the menu for this summer: EXERCISE, EXERCISE, EXERCISE.
When I was in school if I liked someone I just told them. Now that I'm older and about 30lbs heavier, I'm afraid to even approach half the guys I like. Nevermind the ones that I can actually talk to, I mean heaven forbid I actually own up to some feelings for a change. I really miss Scott at times like this. I miss having someone to come home to and cuddle up with on the couch in front of the fire. I miss having someone to cook for and to cook for me. I really miss the just being comfortable enough to say whatever and not worry about him thinking I'm a complete idiot.
When you've been on a grand total of NO dates and guys just want to hang out in groups you start to get a bit more self concious. It's funny because Sara tells me ' you can't be self concious because guys can sense it' well isn't that great because they're the ones making me feel that way! What happened to that unashamed girl that would walk right up to a guy and say hey you wanna go out? I mean where the heck did I loose her??? I keep trying to dig her back out and breathe life back into that person but I'll be damned if I can even find her under all this sad, lonely, self concious carcass I have. I've really got to fix these self esteem issues I've got or else I'll never meet anyone! And then I really will be the dog lady... how sad and pathetic does that sound? Yeah, pretty pathetic. *sigh*
On the menu for this summer: EXERCISE, EXERCISE, EXERCISE.
0 Share The Love:
Post a Comment